Mom asked me last night what my hesitation to sit down and write every day was and I honestly didn’t have an answer. Probably fear? Specifically the fear of being mediocre. That word haunts me.  In my head, I love the idea of sitting down to write something every day. Even if it’s nothing good. … Continue reading Both, and →

Afghanistan  What do I know of dirt ditchesair strikesfriends facedown in the mud What do I know of phone callssobbing mothersclutching children What do I know oflost limbslives in limbohope held hostage What do I know offighting, strongshouting, franticpleading for a planesurviving, lostdying, alone What do I know of dying? What do I know of being alive whilebeing brokenbeing … Continue reading →

*Hi there. I've taken a little pivot from my usual (but who can really call a blog I used to regularly write in two years ago 'usual') writing. This is really just for me now. I am trying to find my voice. To write regularly, and rawly (is that a word?) and to put it … Continue reading August 25, 2021 →

I am going to be very honest: I was really, really hoping the Lord was going to call my family to move to Africa. The idea attached itself to me last fall and did not leave.  In June, Spencer and I actually got to travel to Rwanda and well, I didn’t hear anything. No matter … Continue reading A Lot with a Little →

I have literally started this piece a thousand times in my head. It is maybe why I have not written anything in months. I am perplexed and I don’t know how to adequately express myself. I have the entire spectrum of feelings: anger, pride, deep sadness, hope. I want to say I am coming at … Continue reading Forward Movement →

When Spencer was younger, in kindergarten and first grade, he and his family lived in Leon, France for a couple of years. He actually learned how to read and write in French before he learned to do it in English. This sounds so romantic to me, living in a foreign country, walking the french cobble … Continue reading It’s a Big, Big World →

There are actual muddy handprints on the window in my office right now. My office is also our sitting room, where the record player is, where the bookshelves are. I counted them. There are seven muddy hand prints all in a row. They are courtesy of Ford Young. Last August, I finally sat down to … Continue reading Handprints →

We went camping over the long weekend last weekend. It was 100% Spencer's idea and when he knelt beside our bed and said "I have an idea," I'm pretty sure he thought I would never go along. You see, we have been camping before. Once. When we were dating, I went camping with him and … Continue reading Camping →

Your car pulls out into traffic three cars ahead of me. I immediately recognize it, with its roof rack and green color and my pulse quickens just a little bit. I watch the break lights shine through the other cars in front of me, stopping for a stop light, then disappearing as you release the … Continue reading Crush →

I’ve been thinking a lot about the New Year lately. It being January 3rd and all. I've been thinking about resolutions and ways I want to be better. I know it is cliche, but there is a reason January 1st inspires so many people to pull out those dusty tennis shoes, to dig out that … Continue reading New Year, All Year →